Mom Sounded Good

Hi you all..I spoke with Mom tonight. She sounded great. Thanks Toni & Mimi & Sophie for hanging out with Dad. I guess we should think about how we can get in there once a week to give them a hand with their tasks. This a short note. I am off to sleepy land. Toni, were you able to bookmark the blog address? Love & goodnight...Steve

At the Cifala Homestead

Hi all.  I am whipped...mostly from the heat here, I guess.  Already for the procedure tomorrow.  Mom and Dad are OK...Mimi is set to meet us at the surgical center to sit with grandpop and I.  And to help Noni get into house, as necessary.  Bless you, Mimi.  Won't write much.  But had to tell you that I could not remember the website address of this blog, so I basically googled "blogger.com"  And since I am on Dad's computer, the cookies kicked in and what do you know, I was on Celeste's "angels only" page...i could have posted as her, I guess.  So, Çis if you are reading this..whatever you did when you were here..worked.  Once you are on your blog, signed  in (as you apparently were), you just tell it you want to write a new post.  I know, you are through with this site, but I giggled when I saw your page pop up just by my googling "blogger"...no names...anyway, I'll be back with a report.  Dad seems OK...but they really do like their routine, and my being here tonight, except that I brought dinner mostly cooked, seemed supferfluous...they like their routine..and all these years, I thought Mom was the rigid one!!!...wrong!!! Love to all...

DON'T FORGET TO WRITE A COMMENT BELOW HERE OR ON THE OTHER POSTS IF YOU WANT TO SPEAK TO A CERTAIN POST....

Celeste, hope you don't mind me copying and pasting, but this way Jo will be able to see. She does not have a computer and doesn't look like she will in any near future. I spoke with her today and she assures me that Lauren helps her read and respond, that's all. Here is copy of Celeste's e-mail about her "visit in Virginia".

Hey Toni, John, Mike and Steve (any updates on JoAnn getting on the computer) --

My visit last week to see Mom and Dad was so great. I got in on Sunday before the snow. We watched an Illinois vs. Michigan State basketball game as the snow started to fall. Dad opened all the shutters and turned all the lights on. He such a romantic. We had a simple ham sandwich and soup dinner. Mom wasn't feeling good that day. She was all ready to go to church and told Dad she couldn't go. Monday she was REALLY sick. She never got out of bed, sick to her stomach and dizzy. Seems like the Aricept patch (they tried to switch from the pill form to see if it would relieve her leg cramps) was making her sick. Steve Turner came by and shoveled all the snow. Tuesday she was a little better. We actually were able to pick out new curtains for the den and I went to Target with Dad to buy a new phone for the kitchen. These were things he mentioned to me that keep him awake at night ***so I decided to pursue getting them taken care of. I can't wait till the curtains arrive to see if Mom still likes them or remembers we ordered them. I drove with Dad (and survived). He is pretty "lazy" behind the wheel. He doesn't stop at STOP signs. I gave him grief and told him if he were one of my son's driving like that he'd be in deep dodo. He's working on it. We had a lot of great conversations. He is stressed about a lot of things and of course worried about Mom. They have piles of "work", very well organized, but a lot to handle. Mom is not cooking very much. She did cook the cordon bleu for our family gathering.

It was great visiting with everyone on Thursday. And our meeting in the den was good. Toni, Steve, Dana, Mimi and I got to talk about the future. Toni, I know it will be a huge sacrifice on your part****, but thank you for agreeing to be with them if anything drastic happens. Have you told Mom and Dad that is your plan? It might relieve some of their fears. We also discussed weekly visits by one of the three VA/WVA camps. If you guys could work out some kind of rotation I think it would be especially good for Mom since she is not going out of the house much. I know this week Mom is having her cateract surgery on Thursday and Toni and Mimi are planning to be with them. THANKS !!!

Well I could write volumes but I won't. The main thing I heard from Dad is that he wants to be able to be with Mom, no matter what. He still has his money on an Asby Pond place. All the bigger places are taken but he told me he wouldn't want a big one now. I suggested he not give up on that option. Mom has definitely changed in the last year in terms of her memory and functioning. If she keeps on this course he will not be able to care for her by himself. He also mentioned live in help. Don't know if that would work. He fell twice in the last month and that has me very worried. He's walking up the steps in the morning with a hot pot of coffee, Urgh......

So I spoke to two people at Asby Pond today. I was concerned that that location didn't have the Renaissance Garden facility componant yet. That is their Extended Care place if folks get really needy. They are building one and it will be done by 2011. But the girl (Jill Mendoza) told me there is 24 hour Home Health Support, so they could probably stay together in the apt. for a long time. I also spoke to Dana (no last name) about space availability. The next size apartment down from the biggest apt. (Stratford) is available now. She cautioned not waiting too long. In the event that one of them, or both, are really in need of constant care they might not take them. If they are already living there they have to care for them.

Dad told me when he dropped me off at the train that he is the one that needs to come up with the plan. He hasn't defined what the plan is yet, but I think he knows he needs one pretty soon. I know it will have to be their decision about they do but I sure wish they would make this move so they can enjoy it together. And all the stress of all the "things" in and around that house will be out of the picture. I hope this makes sense. Its been a long day and I'm fading fast. I love you all. Good night. Celeste

I will go back to my note...I think I'll just comment below...anyone else can just click on the "comment" thing and write their response to this....try it. otherwise, just e-mail me with your thoughts and I'll post. Oh, I added a few stars in Celeste's notes as markers for me to respond to. Hope this all helps. Toni

Celeste & her visit with Mom & Dad

Hey..Had a great evening with Mom & Dad, Steve & Mimi & Sophie, & Toni.
We were able to have a couple of conversations about what we could all do to help both mom & dad in their ever changing landscape. Over the past several weeks between Toni, Mimi & I we have managed to get in there for much needed contact.We talked about the three of us, Toni,Mimi & myself, of getting over to their house at least once a week. I think it will work.
Also do mom & dad need to get out of the house or get someone to move in. Either of these moves would be hard...which one would be easier? Soooooo, I believe we should keep this blog up & running. Point is we all need to get on here & look @ the comments & put our ideas on here & continue to solve this revolving change in all of our lives. I will volunteer to get with Celeste & try & solve her problems with getting in the groove with doing this blog. Have a great week everyone! I am grateful that we can all talk to each other & weave thru the obstacles of having aging parents. Ciao Steve

It DID work John...thanks

here is a copy of the e-mail I just sent you all...so to keep this consistent....and again, I made sure last night that all of you are able to POST..though may have to have a gmail address to post. You don't need one to make a "comment."

Hi all. John was able to post a post today....great!! I am discussing something for Mom in October, but will send out more info to everyone soon. I am sending for some brochures...just hoping that all would be available for something. John summarized the idea so well in his post....about something where we could all be together and have a quiet gathering. I had some thoughts in my comment...(click on "comment' at end of John's post if you want to see it.) I know we all have lots of thoughts and concerns about Mom and Dad.

I have not been sending e-mails with each post any more, as no use having so many methods going on. Plus if you respond to my e-mail, it is not readily available to all. What I have for me is the Cifala blog with a "shortcut" on my desktop or you can bookmark the blog and just check every day for more posts....

If it is a very important change or incident, I will e-mail everyone that I posted a note on the blog, otherwise, just check in as you may.

Still haven't posted a note about our visit with Mom and Dad last week...or the plans for Mom's cataracts removal this Thursday. Mimi and I are being with them together....nice! Love to all, Toni

Maybe THIS will work

I just read Toni's thoughts about renting a place to gather around Mom for her birthday in Oct. I have to say my first thought was about the money. I could get over that, especially concidering what a good time we would have with Mom and Dad if the organization could go along smoothly. The main concept is that the six of us can get together peacefully somewhere other then 27th Street, and have a little party for Mom.